Saturday, June 12, 2010

7 Year Old Melt Down

I can't believe I'm going to tell anyone this, I went to MC. Donald's to get on-line to download stuff onto my blog and check my Facebook yesterday. For some reason I couldn't get on!!! I was looking forward to posting on my blog all day. I tried and tried. I was all by myself in my van and couldn't figure it out on my own. Boy did I want to cry. If John was there he would have it fixed in 2 seconds. I had to give up and that is one thing I HATE to do. I drove home all upset that I couldn't post. I walked into the house and John could see on my face that I was very pissed. He asked what happened and I blow up!! This was not a normal blow up, it was a 7 year old in a 33 year old's body. I have no idea what came over me. I cried, yelled and wanted to hit something. I could not believe what I was doing. John couldn't either, he just stood there and told me to clam down. At that moment I was not in my right mind. I'm so glad Joshua wasn't home to see me acting that way. Now I know where Josh gets it from!! When I tell him no he does the same thing!!

The only thing I can think is blogging and sharing my pictures means more to me then I thought. I really enjoy writing and hearing feed back. I know it's nothing special but for me it down time, and I feel like a somebody. Sad but true!! Not being able to get on line at my own house also makes me feel like a failure. I never thought I would be without Internet, but when your cars keep sucking up money and no over time at work, is just whipping us out. I know I need to look at the big picture. We are healthy, we have a roof over our heads, and we still have our jobs!! This is just a set back that will only make us stronger. In time things will go back to the way they were. I'm one of those people who want it fix A.S.A.P. and I need to learn that isn't always what can happen.

So with that said, yesterday I found out that there is a side of me I didn't know I had. I have always said I was a kid at heart. I guess it's more true then I thought. Hehehe.



Jeanne said...

hehe sometimes it just feels good to get it out of your system. I know what you mean about the blogging and sharing pics thing. I was gonna break from my blog but thanks to some very sweet comments(including you guys) and some severe(hissy fit) frustration with Facebook I decided I really loved my blog. So back at it and thankfully no connection troubles like you've had. Yes we do need to look at the big picture and all will work itself out.

The Pats said...

Hang in there! At least you were able to recognize and analyze the situation and then go on. Around Minnesota, we're blaming our bad moods on the weather. It's been cloudy and rainy for almost 2 weeks - yuck!

Barbara said...

Of course you were upset! I would be too. Our blogs are where we share, vent, cheer each other on, keep each other going, celebrate, brag, and can get our feelings out. Don't apologize for having a "meltdown".....we ALL need them at times. It washes all the 'bad' away and we can start with a clean slate. Believe me, I've had many of my own!