I can't believe I'm going to tell anyone this, I went to MC. Donald's to get on-line to download stuff onto my blog and check my Facebook yesterday. For some reason I couldn't get on!!! I was looking forward to posting on my blog all day. I tried and tried. I was all by myself in my van and couldn't figure it out on my own. Boy did I want to cry. If John was there he would have it fixed in 2 seconds. I had to give up and that is one thing I HATE to do. I drove home all upset that I couldn't post. I walked into the house and John could see on my face that I was very pissed. He asked what happened and I blow up!! This was not a normal blow up, it was a 7 year old in a 33 year old's body. I have no idea what came over me. I cried, yelled and wanted to hit something. I could not believe what I was doing. John couldn't either, he just stood there and told me to clam down. At that moment I was not in my right mind. I'm so glad Joshua wasn't home to see me acting that way. Now I know where Josh gets it from!! When I tell him no he does the same thing!!
The only thing I can think is blogging and sharing my pictures means more to me then I thought. I really enjoy writing and hearing feed back. I know it's nothing special but for me it down time, and I feel like a somebody. Sad but true!! Not being able to get on line at my own house also makes me feel like a failure. I never thought I would be without Internet, but when your cars keep sucking up money and no over time at work, is just whipping us out. I know I need to look at the big picture. We are healthy, we have a roof over our heads, and we still have our jobs!! This is just a set back that will only make us stronger. In time things will go back to the way they were. I'm one of those people who want it fix A.S.A.P. and I need to learn that isn't always what can happen.
So with that said, yesterday I found out that there is a side of me I didn't know I had. I have always said I was a kid at heart. I guess it's more true then I thought. Hehehe.